“When the student is ready the teacher will appear.” –Buddhist Proverb
I was chatting with a friend earlier today. He was a bit exasperated that in spite of his best efforts his attempts to help people close to him were ignored.
It’s natural to want to help others with what we know. It’s also good for us. Jim Rohn advises “pouring out the knowledge you do have – it makes room for more.” Running this blog is one of the examples of how I try to help others with what I’ve learned. Mama-Mia!
But the down side is some people will never pay attention.
We may have skills that would solve a co-worker’s relationship problem. Does she want to hear it? That depends really. Personally, my style is I like for people to ask for help before I offer my assistance.
But sometimes even when they ask, they never follow through. Some people I know continually make the same mistake over and over. When they ask me what they should do, I say “You know that mistake you made 3 times? Change your approach – what you are doing doesn’t work!” Some take the advice, others go right back to taking the action that has failed repeatedly.
I am not immune to being an “unprepared student”. I have books on my shelf I read 15 years ago that sounded great at the time, but didn’t do a thing for me. In rereading them at this time, they make infinitely more sense. I now have the experience to apply the knowledge.
So the question isn’t how do we become better teachers, but how do we become prepared students? How do we become ready so teachers will appear to aid us?
That is a question I will be thinking about for the next few days. In the meantime, why not post your thoughts on becoming “Ready”…
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“He was a … to spite his best …….close to him were ignored.”
Sorry, but did you mean despite (in spite of) or were his efforts being spited?
moving right along…
“Change your approach – what you are doing doesn’t work!”
Keyword there being change…. change is uncomfortable, it requires WORK. Do we really need teachers? I think that most times we know what the lessons are. Sometimes it’s a matter of simply doing what you know you should even though you’d rather not put in the effort.
I guess to make yourself ready the best thing you could do is be open to change.
Annie, it was supposed to say In spite of, I made the correction (one of those late night post errors)
Remaining open to change is necessary in order for the lesson to sink in. But what I am getting at is how is it someone can read a book one day and it mean one thing and read the same book again in 5 years and it mean something more.
Brad,
When you mentioned people that keep making the same mistake over and over, it reminded me of one of my wife’s favorite questions.
My wife is a fan of Dr. Phil, and whenever people try to explain their bad behavior or some clearly illogical decision, he always asks, “So, how’s that working out for you?”
It’s a good question who’s answer often helps prepare the student (it usually works when used on me!)
Andrew, that is a good question! Thanks for posting.
how is it someone can read a book one day and it mean one thing and read the same book again in 5 years and it mean something more.
I think you answered your question in your post…
“I now have the experience to apply the knowledge.”
You don’t have the knowledge & experiences at 20 that you would have at 30. How then can one relate to a situation/lesson without experience? I think the best example I can give would be in looking at artwork. To a layman looking at an abstract painting for the first time they may see only splotches of paint. A person who has studied art or at the very least read books on abstract art may see the emotion in those splotches.
We can’t predict what life will throw at us (Can’t force a lifetime of knowledge into a little pill for us to take in all at once). We can only be open to what it might teach us as each day comes. Really, what else is there to do?
Ick! Sorry my posts are so long and terribly formatted. Are we able to add in html tags when posting comments to pretty things up a bit?
Dr. Phil has his quirks, but I do love that particular line from him. It really drives the point home.
It’s just sad when people KNOW that it’s not working well for them, and continue on anyway. Unfortunately, at some point, I often feel compelled to give up and just not offer anymore. Just listen. It’s not great, but it is easier on me mentally.
Annie, I am looking for a fix for the formatting issue in comments
B. What do they call the definition of insanity? Doing the same things over and over hoping for….
Ick! Sorry my posts are so long and terribly formatted. Are we able to add in html tags when posting comments to pretty things up a bit?
How’s it looking now?