Project Dream Dating Part 4: Five Steps To Being In The Right Place At The Right Time

The first rule of marketing and meeting singles is the same: location, location, LOCATION!

This is the 3rd article in the Project Dream Dating 2007 series. If you haven’t read the prior installments each one builds on the other so please go back and read them now. Here are the links:

Part 1: Project Dream Dating 2007 Introduction

Part 2: Project Dream Dating 2007 Background On Shyness

Part 3: Know Who You Are Looking For

In Part 3 I detailed how you can stop drifting and start deciding the type of people you are compatible with. Since so many people rely on luck or chance they often end up meeting and dating the wrong people. If you don’t know where you are going, who knows where you’ll end up? But a well thought out compatibility list will give you a fighting chance to find the right person for you.

But how do you take that list and turn it into something you can use to meet the right person? I am glad you asked…

Here are 5 steps to turn your compatibility list into a road map for meeting singles like you:

1. Associate each attribute on your list with an activity – This is simple to do with the like-to-haves part of your compatibility list. Go through your list point by point and associate social activities with each one. Try to stretch yourself and come up with 3-4 of these events. For instance (and I am just pulling this out of a hat) if you have an interest in jogging, you might put down:

• Fitness classes
• Jogging clubs
• Marathons – where you could run or volunteer for water duty
• Fund raisers

2. Pick the Activities you like the most – As you can see, just one interest of yours might explode into weeks worth of social engagements. So choose the activities and hobbies you like the most. You only have a limited amount of time in a week, so you’ll want to make sure you are participating in the events that you feel excited about.

3. Research local meetings, classes and events in your area – Once you have pinpointed the top 7-10 activities that align with your interests, do some research. Make a few phone calls and ask some questions. How many people attend? What type of person signs up for this class, event, etc? Do they need any volunteers or help?

4. Assess whether compatible people will be at the event – The main point here is you want to make sure that not only are you right for them are they right for you? This is a little more tricky, but I think you are up to the task. Try to get a feel for if a large number of people who you don’t want to meet attend this particular event. For instance if you hate smoking, but the local Jazz dance class was set up and is maintained by a tobacco company, guess what? There’s going to be some smokers there.

5. Show up - At this point you’ve got a highly focused list of events and meetings. All you have to do is show up. Be there and participate in what’s going on.

Can you see how the traditional “Meat markets”, bars and dance clubs are weak avenues compared to mingling in your own preferred social setting? By getting into your environment, you have the “home team advantage.” You can relax, not worry about what to say, and simply talk about the hobby. To form this same relaxed demeanor at a singles bar takes weeks or months, where at a enthusiast club meeting for your hobby you’ll start building those strong relationships on the first night.

A final thought… At this stage I am not saying you should exclusively pick hobbies or events where you might meet your dream date. What’s most important is determining what you like to do with your time. And like the old adage says. “You can’t love another if you don’t love yourself first.” By filling your evenings and weekends with fun stuff you like to do around people you like to associate, you’ll begin to like yourself more. You’ll appreciate this brief time of being single where you have the freedom to do what you want.

Take it all in, have some fun, treat yourself to nights of fun doing what you like to do. When you meet the right person, you won’t have as much time to throw your whole heart and soul into your own interests. You’ll have to divide it with your partner. So, rather than looking at being single as a negative, it’s really a positive. There is no better time for self confidence and self appreciation than when you are single.

Use this time for all you can for it will be gone all too soon…

The next installment of Project Dream Dating 2007 will tackle the issue of shyness and lack of self confidence. I’ll show you how like a muscle you can build self confidence one baby step at a time. If you are shy, you won’t want to miss it. Grab the RSS Feed Here.