Why would someone want a mentor?
I talk about failing as being a good thing on this site, because failure brings us closer to the success we seek. But sometimes, there can be a better way. We don’t necessarily have to go through all the trials and tribulations in order to get where we want to go. One of the ways to get the “straight path” is through a mentor.
A mentor is someone who has done what you set out to do. They can save you time, money, energy, social status and keep you away from the rivers of Hell if you can find a good one.
But one common problem with mentors is that they are expensive. Some mentors charge thousands of dollars per hour. Depending where you are in life, you may not be able to afford the services of a high-falooting mentor right now.
That’s why I am going to show you how to get one at no cost:
It takes a little bit of digging to find a mentor who has specific expertise but it’s worth the effort. Read your local newspaper. Thumb through the Yellow Pages. Go to the Library and ask the librarian if he knows who specializes locally in the skill you want to develop. You might be surprised at how insightful a good librarian can be at locating such information lickity-split.
Asking
Once you’ve identified a few people who would make good mentors, then it’s time to ask.
I recommend you follow a few ground rules before contacting a prospective mentor.
First, respect that the mentor is very busy.
And also understand and respect that they are the expert.
Therefore when I approach someone I’d like to mentor me, I acknowledge both their busyness as well as their expertise.
For instance, I might say something like
“Dr. Johnston, I was reading in the business news about your ranking as one of the top three ___________ in the city, and I know you are busy.
I am just getting started at _______________ (or in the exploratory stage of _________________) and am looking for some direction. Would you or someone you know be available to answer six or seven questions I have? I promise it won’t take more than 15 minutes of your time.”
I don’t think I’ve ever been turned down when I approach someone in this manner for advice. And more than once, the meeting resulted in either a job offer or the offer of an internship. What could be better than being mentored by one of the best and getting paid for it or getting on-the-job training?
How to handle the first meeting
When your potential mentor agrees to meet with you, do not waste their time. Make sure you are organized. If you said you were going to ask them six or seven questions, make sure you have them written down and be prepared to take notes on the answers. Also, I think it’s classy to keep careful watch on time. If I promise that I’ll be only 15 minutes, I stop the meeting in 15 minutes. I say “I promised I would only take 15 minutes of your time, I know how busy you are.
The person always responds “oh, that’s okay…” and the meeting continues. Sometimes for more than an hour.
Now why would a mentor give you their time for free?
Many of the people who have done what you strive to do, won’t charge you a red cent to help you. But why?
They often long to share their information with someone who wants to hear what they have to say. They might have employees who have to listen and learn, but it’s different to have someone want to listen. Make sense?
As a former network administrator and now CIO, I have mentored students in the pursuit of network administration. I’ve employed interns and try to answer questions via e-mail when I can.
This takes my time, and if looked at in the strictest sense, costs money too. So why would I do it for free?
There are several reasons, really. There were mentors in my past who helped me without charging me. Maybe I can return the favor.
When I teach, I learn as much as or more than the person I am teaching. It strengthens my skills and makes me better at what I do.
Finally, I’m gaining the support of people who can help me down the road. Mentoring well means that you’ll have another expert who can help you solve some puzzles when they specialize.
So if you want to succeed, seek out people who have done what you want to and ask them for their help. They just might give it to you for free.
This is part 68 of 101 Goal Setting Breakthroughs: A 31 Day Blog Series That Will Make 2008 Your Best Year Ever! Subscribe to my free RSS feed to get the rest of the series and never miss a tip!
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{ 1 comment }
I am a fulltime student and I really want to improve my writing skill. However, English is not my first language which make it diffucult for me to get the best of my education. I would appreciate if I can find somoene who can help me to revise my papers. Having a mentor could really help me to achieve my goals and drems. If there is someone who want to make a difference in my life and want to help please let me know.
Thank you,